Pain

 The morning has broken and all that awaited me was a cold shallow woman with no heart. How she is running a household... I am guessing through brute force. She smiles fakely with a mouth of teeth that look like they are ready to take a bite out of your face. She is hungry for destruction and feeds on hate and jealousy.. 

I feel like a I have a conglomerate of chicken hearts in my chest around her. I feel like I have a blockage in my throat when I try to swallow or breathe. My face feels hot, my eyes feel like they are melting down my face in pools of liquid. I have to suffer through her mental abuse and cold staring eyes and open ears. She looks for trouble and accuses to get her way. She is a master manipulor. Manipulating people and hurting their hearts and minds. All her children have substance abuse issues and she threw her husband's children from other wives out on the streets to fend for themselves.

She is a huge woman ..violent and dangerous. Plotting.

So, that's her but looking inward...what about me? I think I'm a weasel..living on her property. I should run because she will never change and never has. Who am I to talk about her? Right? Just my Fathers oldest daughter with no birthright, nothing. She stole that from me and is giving it to her children and grandchildren.

She figures she earned it but she stole it. A Raiderette.

I would blame the internet and phone for it's influence but she's been this way before those things.  Some things never change.

My legs are weak and my heart is weaker. I can't stand on my own two feet. I'm primed for the kill.

Oh woe is me. The victim, my sister would say, Well, she is so screwed up she can't even love. She has no love. Thanks to this evil woman. She killed my sister, heart and soul. My sister is just as evil as her if not worse. My sister had to grow up in this woman's household ..well at least until she ran away at 16 years of age.. never to return for any length of time. " This woman" wouldn't let her. 

I wonder which is going to to go to hell? And which is going to go to heaven. I don't even think she believes in Jesus. I think she thinks he's a joke and only used him to make herself look good when we were below age.

I'm starving. I gotta hang this rack up.




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